Monday, December 30, 2013

Love Until the Sun Grows Cold- Part II


Hello, beautiful world! The coming of a new year calls for a celebration- and one of the best ways to celebrate is the exchange of gifts. Well, what could be a better present than a story? So here is my gift to you: the final part of 'Love Until the Sun Grows Cold'. {To read the previous part, click here.} I am hoping you all will enjoy reading this, and will gift me with your feedback! :P Wishing each one of you a wonderful new year! Happy reading!


  Guilt seared his heart but he knew he wasn’t the only one responsible for what happened. It was so difficult to explain something like this, especially after so much time had passed. Would Tara understand his reasons? Were they even justified? There was only so much he could have done, and he had suffered every day for God knew how long because of the decisions he had made- the decisions that were perhaps preordained; something that Tara could not understand, and Seher would not recognize.

"You never gave me a chance to speak to you about it,” he said. “When Seher moved abroad, you refused to talk to me for months. I got an email from you, telling me exactly how ‘despicable’ you think I am. I knew that nothing I said at the moment would matter anymore.”

   What he didn’t mention was that he had thought of a hundred different things to say to her then, to hurt her as much as she had hurt him. But he knew what would bother her most- silence on his part. He never replied. After Seher left, Tara seemed to have become a different person. She looked like she carried some secret with her; something that she would guard jealously, like treasure, but which seemed to give her some sort of masochistic pleasure.

He knew she was furious with him, and anticipated a terrible fight with a lot of name calling, and throwing things on her part. Instead, she had been so cold towards him all this while; that was a side of her he hadn’t known. Ignoring the way his gut clenched at the thought, he continued. “I am not denying that I was at fault. I just don't want you to think that I did not love her, because I did." 

  “All you had to do was give her a reason to come back. The Uday I thought I knew would never have let something go by him without doing whatever he could to make things right!”

“And I had never guessed that you, of all people, would leave me to my ‘misery’ without even hearing me out first!” He snapped back.  Several people turned to look at them.

  “You didn’t reply to my mail. It made me think I was right about everything I accused you of,” she hissed.

He frowned at her, weighing his next words carefully. “She is the most beautiful person I have ever known and she loved me even more than I could have hoped for. She had been there for me all those years, giving me the strength to go on, to have something to strive for. I still can’t fill the void she has left behind. And yet you thought I was trying to get out of the relationship because I was just not into her anymore?”

   “I never said it like that-”

“- but that’s what you thought, isn’t it?” He said, with a shrewd look. Tara’s eyes were glistening; she blinked rapidly and looked away. His gaze softened and he said gently, “I know that she was one of your best friends and you loved her; it’s bad enough to see good friends fight and it must have been even harder watching the two of us fall apart.”

  “It was.”

“But I had certainly not expected you to let our own friendship suffer, especially not after you saw what Seher’s absence did to both of us. I needed you to be there for me. But all I was left with was my own guilt and the pain of losing two of the most extraordinary people in my life. I loved her, Tara. I think I still do.”

  “But you gave up on her.” She said softly.

“And I still stay up at night sometimes, wondering if I made the correct decision. You have no idea how often I mistrust my choices; there’s always this fear inside me that I made a huge mistake.” He swallowed. “At the time, I did what I thought what was best for us- best for her. But every other day, I look back at the past and wish I could have taken the easy way out, by holding on to her for as long as possible until we had no other option but to stay apart. Your resentment added to my own disappointment. I didn’t need that- I blamed myself enough for both of us, I think.”

  Tara’s stomach turned over with guilt. She couldn’t even look him in the eye. “I was too heartbroken to see it that way. I am sorry, Uday.” She looked miserable. “I shouldn’t have made things worse for you. Seher has been like an elder sister to me all these years, and all the suffering that came with your break up with her was too difficult for me to deal with...She wouldn’t talk to me because I reminded her of you. You have no clue how hard that was for me to hear. And every time I would see you across the street, I would just be reminded that you were the reason she chose to leave- not just the country, but me too.”

“I’m sorry, Tara. I really wish it didn’t have to be that way.” Uday looked at her sadly.

  It was a while before she spoke again. “She was the first friend I made in the neighbourhood. When I was just about ten years old, she moved to the other end of the city, and your family came to live in her house instead. I was so unsure about having you as my next door neighbour. You were the evil guy with the dorky glasses who took over my friend’s place. I was so young that I thought she had to leave so that you could stay.”

Uday smiled at that. “I guess that’s a good thing then, because if you hadn’t felt that way, Seher wouldn’t have tried so hard to get us all to become friends.”

  “It sounds so incredibly stupid, but my little girl grudges against you came rushing back after she left. You really did seem to be the one to make her go away. It was immature and juvenile, but it soothed my ego because there were times when I used to think that I hadn’t tried hard enough to make things better either. I could’ve tried to help her understand that she couldn’t just leave everything to you; that she had to take things into her own hands because that was the only way out. But it was just so much easier putting the blame on you. I am so sorry.” It was incredible, how all of their lives were altered from that moment on, because of one person’s decision and another’s indecision.

“Well, I can’t really blame you. I know I had some part to play in hurting you too.” He said.

  “She just wanted you to approach her parents and get engaged. They would only have allowed her to live in the city and work if they knew she had someone to take care of her.” said Tara. “They were anyway in such a hurry to get her married. You knew there was no way she could convince them to let her wait a few more years once they all left for Oman.”

Uday leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees and his hands clasped together. “You need to understand that I did every possible thing I could to make sure Seher and I would end up together some day. I put my dreams aside so that I could make the ‘sensible choice’. I worked day and night to make myself capable enough.”

  He looked up at her just then, willing her to understand. “But don’t you see that her parents would inevitably have thought that I had not yet proved myself worthy of her? No matter how much they appreciate me as a person, they would never have agreed to let their only daughter marry a guy who did not yet have a stable, well paid job.”

“I know you asked her to stay. She told me so, on the day she left.” said Tara. “She was too scared to live away from family just for the sake of a guy who couldn’t promise that he would marry her.”

  “But she wasn’t willing to stay for your sake, either.” He said quietly.

His words pierced her heart but she didn’t let it show. “She would have, if you two had gotten engaged. Because then her parents might have felt better about leaving her behind-”

  “-Or not.” He finished for her.


Well, he was right about that. There was always a chance that things might not have turned out how Seher had hoped. “She was sure she wouldn’t be allowed to remain there. I wish she had the courage to choose the difficult, but better option- convincing her parents to let her stay, at least so that she could build her own career. She would not have had much to lose.”

  “And she could have bought us more time.” He sighed. “Seher said she couldn’t do it, so I must propose marriage and make sure that wherever she ends up staying, our relationship would stay alive. But I know her parents would have felt cheated because of being kept in the dark about our relationship all these years. You were the only one who knew but they wouldn’t have spared you either. You know they’d have been furious and she would anyway have been forced to leave.”

“Except that it would have felt a hundred times worse.” She finally understood.

  “This was my way of giving her a chance to make a fresh start. I owed her that much.” He couldn’t go on. Seher might have hurt him at times, over the years, and she might not have gone that extra mile for him when he needed her to, but Uday knew he could not hold her responsible. She deserved better than that.

“I thought you should know…that she did start over.” She said, in barely more than a whisper. His head jerked up at that. “She got married a year ago. She’s fine.” Tara had been staring at him, which was why she did not question the truth of the words he spoke.

“I’m… glad.”

   The change in him was hard to miss. He sighed deeply like he had been waiting with bated breath all this while. And somehow she knew what he had been waiting for- something which mattered to him above all else: finding Seher happy. It was then that she realized just how much he had loved her. He had already been living with the memory of her all this time. He had grown used to not to have her around in person, that was true. But she was always at the back of his mind like a song that keeps playing in our heads from time to time; one that we might not listen to anymore, but we never really get over it because it is special, because it made a difference.

  Each person holds a special place in our hearts. The imprints they leave in our lives remain etched into our memory, and while we learn to love again, the love we share with someone is always unique and can never be the same for another. She would never be his to claim, but he also knew that no one else could claim the part of her that belonged to him. He had already found love, but that day he found something more, something that he hadn’t known was buried deep within him. That which helps lessen the pain that inexorably comes with the course of true love: forgiveness, meant for her and also for himself. He could now live without the guilt, the pain, the sense of loss.

  When they said their goodbyes a quarter of an hour later, Tara watched Uday walk away, beaming at her, the bright sunshine illuminating the happiness on his face. She smiled back at him, thinking that perhaps she was right in not telling him that the friend she was visiting that day was Seher...But was she right, she asked herself? 


                                                                 
                                                                                                                                                                                                     *************The End************* 





PS: The pictures have been taken from Google. :)

Wednesday, December 25, 2013

Secret Santa with a Twist - Reviewing a blog


It is that time of the year when everything is lighted and decked up. Colorful festoons, confetti, pretty glittery decor, paper star lanterns, plum cakes, eggnog and colorfully decorated Christmas trees - it is my second favourite time of the year (first being Durga pujo).



My fondest childhood memories of Christmas are waking up to find the gifts Santa left on my bed and singing carols later with my friends.  This year the awesome blogeshwaris at Indiblogeshwaris decided to add a twist to the Secret Santa. We are playing the mischievous elves and secretly reviewing some amazing blogs. I'm reviewing Karan Shah's blog, Scribble.

To begin with the review, I love how the blog looks. The beautiful waves crashing in the header and the subtitle "Life is what happens when you are busy planning other things!!! - so I keep scribbling around" beautifully complements the overall blue background and feel of the blog. The blog has a journal like feeling where he scribbles his thoughts and pens his feelings.

Karan started his blog way back in 2010 but it is of late that he started posting regularly. He is a really versatile writer and his blog is a wonderful conglomeration of poems, short pieces of fiction and book reviews.
I really loved the 55 fiction pieces, he does a great job telling terribly tiny tales within the word constraints. Crisp, brief and beautiful writing.
What I loved most were his poems. The one titled "Mother" is poignant, deceptively simple and beautifully rhythmic, a wonderful dedication to one's mother. Karan is a poet at heart and all his blog posts have a beautiful rhythm and rhyme, even the most prosaic ones. He has really matured and grown as a blogger from the time he started.

There is one thing I think Karan could have added to his blog, an ABOUT ME section where he gives a little introduction about himself, his life and things he loves. Would love to see more book reviews and

Visit his blog and show some love.

Merry Christmas, people!!


Thursday, December 12, 2013

Book review- The Cosmic Clues by Manjiri Prabhu

The Cosmic Clues

Author: Manjiri Prabhu
ISBN-13: 9788184954791
Binding: Paperback
Publisher: Jaico Publishing House
Number of Pages: 324
Genre: Fiction 
Language: English
Price: Rs. 299 (Got a review copy from publishers)


About the Book: 

Sonia Samarth couldn't have predicted it. It had only been a day, but her first advertisement had drawn dozens of responses. In the bustling city of Pune, with its winding alleys and exotic customs, Sonia has launched a brand new business - private investigation guided by Hindu astrology. Her unique brand of investigation might raise eyebrows but before long, she seems to have found her niche.
When a cat leads Sonia to her very first investigation, she uses astrology to unmask the killer. Suddenly, clients begin streaming in a persistent, handsome TV personality, a terrified bride to be a missing husband with suicidal tendencies. These cases initially seem like isolated experiences, but Sonia soon finds that they are bound by an invisible thread. Very soon she will have to look closely at her own stars a notorious international criminal has just crossed Sonias path and he has his own plans for her future.

Aniesha Speaks :

I don't quite know how to start this review since it had a lot of elements I am biased about: 
i) Astrology and
 ii) a cat. 
All my life, I have preferred a cat over a dog, which has earned me both weird stares and awkward questions. Nevertheless, I will still go ahead and proclaim to the world that I am indeed a cat person. When I read the gist where it says Sonia Samarth's luck changes when the cat walks into their Stellar Investigations office, I was intrigued. I just knew I had to read this one for myself. 

Manjari Prabhu does not disappoint us when she says that this is India's first detective who combines astrology with her investigations. Reading horoscopes has always been regarded as scared in India, and this runs true through all the cases Sonia solves. 

Instead of focusing on one particular crime, Prabhu takes us through a series of unfortunate events, which slowly establishes Sonia and Jatin's detective agency. There is also subtle hints about her love life with Mohnish Rai, a freelance journalist, who also happens to own a flower shop! (I thought that touch was pretty cool... a florist...wow!!!) 

A few hundred pages into the novel and Sonia begins to get flower bouquets from a Secret Admirer...even though she suspects they are sent by Mohnish, there is an unexpected twist in the tale. 

Prabhu holds the reader's interest to the last and yes, this book really is one of its kind. I am afraid to write more because I fear I'd end up revealing too much and take away the mystery from the readers. What has made me happier was the stamp on the cover whic said, "Soon to be a major motion picture." I really look forward to seeing this story on screen, and I am wondering who should play Sonia Samarth! 

Reviewed by Aniesha for Dreams and Drama.

Friday, December 6, 2013

Love Until the Sun Grows Cold: Part 1



Hello, beautiful people! I guess I'm feeling sheepish about blogging after what feels like an age. :P Things have just been topsy turvy lately, and I couldn't find the chance to return to it. I am back, though, and hopefully for good! There's a story I've been meaning to share for ever, and I am finally posting it. Your feedback is more than welcome; hope you all will like it! Happy reading!





It was a breezy winter morning when Tara boarded the ferry from Singapore to Bintan Island, Indonesia. Dressed flawlessly in a chic red turtleneck sweater, skinny blue jeans and flat boots, she dropped into a seat by the window and sighed. It was an hour long ride and for some strange reason there weren't a lot of intriguing passengers around to have a chat with; in fact, there weren't nearly enough people on board as expected.

   She pulled a magazine out of her heavy rucksack and began flipping through it randomly, even though she was highly tetchy that day and not at all in the mood to read. She was going to meet an old friend after what felt like ages and couldn't wait to get off the ferry.

It was a while before she sensed someone’s eyes on her. She looked up to see a guy peeking at her furtively. Tara quickly averted her eyes even though he seemed oddly familiar…Realizing that she had noticed him gawking at her, he decided to throw caution to the winds and approach her. Years had passed since she had sent him that email, reproaching him for his actions. Perhaps she had forgiven him?

   Picking up his briefcase, he made his way over and slid into the seat opposite hers. "Hi...Tara, right? Remember me?"

She raised an eyebrow at him. "No, actually, I don't."

   “I’m Uday.”

Her dark brown eyes widened incredulously. Could it really be him? The nerdy, happy-go-lucky guy who never cared much for looks? Impeccably dressed in an oxford shirt, trousers and a blazer, he now looked elegant and very, very upmarket. He smiled at the look on her face, making his dimples all the more stunning. "It's strange how hard it gets to recognize even a dear friend after years of being separated." 

   She shifted in her seat, embarrassed that she had been so obvious. It felt like one of those awkward moments when you're introduced to someone with whom you're expected to be polite, but don't know what to say to. “Well, you seem…different.”

He ran a hand through his hair self-consciously. “Honestly, I don’t know whether or not to take that as a compliment.”

  “Oh, I meant in a good way.” She replied. When he looked dubious, Tara gave him a cocky grin. “You look snazzy.”

He grinned back. "How come you're on your way to Bintan Island?"

  "I'm visiting a friend." She replied; an odd look came over her face as she watched his reaction.

He cleared his throat nervously, wondering what to say next. "So how have you been? I heard you weren’t too happy about studying in Singapore."

  “Oh, I actually like it here now.” She waved a hand airily.

“How come you got over the homesickness so soon?” said Uday.

  “I have two words for that: Retail Therapy.”

He chuckled. There was a quiet confidence about him that was charming, she noticed. And he seemed to have grown more mature, debonair. “You know, I never expected to see you here of all places.” She said.

  “Yeah, I know. I’m on a business trip actually.” He seemed to be gearing himself up for something. He cleared his throat again and tried- but failed- to look nonchalant. “Have you heard from Seher lately?”

“Yes. I have.” She said through pursed lips. She knew Seher was bound to come up at some point in the conversation. For a moment, the past seemed to hang in the air between them. The old familiarity gone, neither knew what to say to the other.

  Tara wondered how it would have been had her two best friends not broken up. There are some relationships which are built upon the foundation of such a powerful love that it envelopes others in its warm embrace. Seeing two such people fall in love can bring an inexplicable harmony; there is some sense of rightness in their being together. There may be turbulence in the relationship; something might not be working out. But when you know they are with each other, it feels like things are in their right place. It’s comforting, reassuring and peaceful. It’s right.

  Life doesn’t always go our way, however. Things fall apart. And we realize that the only way we can keep the love alive is in our memory. It can be devastating. Not just for those who are in love; but for everyone involved. When two people break up, they lose each other. But the friend loses the best of them both- the part that all three of them shared; that which nothing else can replace. Uday knew just as well as she did that he and Seher were perfect together. She was the woman of his dreams; and Tara had actually admitted that she herself could never consider any other guy to be as worthy of her friend. And yet he had let ‘Fate’ take over their lives.  

                                                                                                            




 She turned away, staring determinedly out of the window. She knew she wasn't being fair by blaming him for the break up- she hadn't even been fair to herself. She need not have lost him as a friend too. But how could she have talked to him every other day when she knew that Seher would not have broken all ties with her if it hadn't been for him?

  Seher might have come back into her life, but things were just not the same anymore. It might be selfish, but Tara felt like Uday had let things come crashing down even though he knew what it would mean for the three of them- the end of the best phase of their lives; the end of their friendship. 

All the anger and resentment she had felt towards him suddenly came crashing into the present, momentarily wiping out all other thought from her mind. “You let her go,” she said in a flat voice, and saw the pain flash across his face.

  “I couldn’t make her stay.” He whispered.

  Guilt seared his heart but he knew he wasn’t the only one responsible for what happened. It was so difficult to explain something like this, especially after so much time had passed. Would Tara understand his reasons? Were they even justified? There was only so much he could have done, and he had suffered every day for God knew how long because of the decisions he had made- the decisions that were perhaps preordained; something that Tara could not understand, and Seher would not recognize.

"You never gave me a chance to speak to you about it,” he said. “When Seher moved abroad, you refused to talk to me for months. I got an email from you, telling me exactly how ‘despicable’ you think I am. I knew that nothing I said at the moment would matter anymore.”

   What he didn’t mention was that he had thought of a hundred different things to say to her then, to hurt her as much as she had hurt him. But he knew what would bother her most- silence on his part. He never replied. After Seher left, Tara seemed to have become a different person. She looked like she carried some secret with her; something that she would guard jealously, like treasure, but which seemed to give her some sort of masochistic pleasure...

                                                  **************************

(...To be continued)